A Call to Divest From Transactional Thinking

A crumbly bunch of chocolate chip cookies on a white background

I once saw a tweet that read, “Sure, he knows feminist theory, but does he do the dishes?” This quote has stayed with me for years because it’s a helpful gauge for whether my actions are aligned with my values. Hypocrisy has become the hallmark of many progressive men who…

Joe Rogan’s comments reveal a values disconnect

Joe Rogan asserted,

“You can never be woke enough. That’s the problem. It keeps going. It keeps going further and further and further down the line and if you get to the point where you capitulate, where you agree to all these demands, it’ll eventually get to ‘straight white men…

Pushing past our privilege

I once was a deeply religious person. I was a devout member of the Mormon (or Latter-day Saint) faith tradition, and I spent a lot of time reading the Bible and other books of scripture unique to Mormonism. I developed a deep love for the Jesus Christ of the gospels…

Experiencing all there is to offer

Growing up in conservative Utah, I didn’t have to be explicitly taught what was and wasn’t inside of the male range of acceptable behaviors. It was clear to me that I was to shun anything that felt soft and feminine in favor of what was hard and masculine. I ran…

Sexual Predators?

Given that I have a blog and podcast titled Feminist Masculinity, you might guess that I watch a fair number of videos regarding feminism, masculinity, and adjacent topics. That is why the YouTube algorithm, through its wise and not at all destructive recommendations, showed me a number of videos making…

I was told, recently,

Humans evolved as storytellers.

From the mythical to the mundane,

The full span of any life is bound

In the act of transmitting meaning.

Meaning that must be first found

In an indifferent universe.

Humans search, eyes peeled,

For even the slightest shade of purpose.


Dehumanization just ain’t it.

My partner and I were traveling up I-15 toward Salt Lake City Utah the weekend before the election. It was 3pm on a Sunday in Mormon country, which should usually mean light traffic even in this section of I-15 known best for its constant state of…

A reflection on merciful accountability.

John Green, author of The Fault in Our Stars, is a creep and belongs in prison according to a tweet a saw recently. The evidence presented being the way that he, a grown man, described and wrote about teenage girls in his books. I have read, and enjoyed, several of…

A look at erotic content through a critical lens


What a word, right? There is intense stigma and debate around it at the moment, with some anti-porn proponents calling it “the new drug” and saying that it is as addictive as cocaine or heroin and will destroy the life of anyone who watches it, while others see it as…

How policing masculinity helps no one.

Feeling Superior

Picture, if you will, an encounter with the resident coffee snob in your life as you are coming out of your local coffee shop, brew in hand.

They, the snob, an eyebrow quizzically raised, ask the dreaded question,

“What did you get?”

You, with an inward sigh of dismay, tell…

Alan Parley Buys

Feminist, Ecosocialist, Social Worker. Creator of feministmasculinity.com

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